MIT Scientists Stunned to Discover DNA is Just an Unruly Pile of String That Somehow Works
In yet another chapter of “Science Figuring Out What Nature Has Been Pulling Off For Billions of Years,” MIT chemists have revolutionized the field of genetics by using artificial intelligence to predict how DNA will twist itself into borderline incomprehensible knots inside cells—now, in minutes instead of days.
For those unfamiliar with the struggle, every single human cell is tasked with cramming approximately two meters of DNA into a space smaller than the period at the end of this sentence. And somehow, in this cellular equivalent of a Black Friday sale at a department store, each cell still knows which genes to express, making sure your skin cells don’t start thinking they belong in your liver.
“We basically taught an AI to predict how DNA tangles itself up so that your body doesn’t accidentally start growing an ear inside your stomach,” explained MIT’s Bin Zhang, clearly both impressed and horrified by biology. “Now that we can do this in record time, we can finally answer the big questions, like ‘Why does my hair refuse to cooperate on humid days?’”
Using a technology called ChromoGen, which should not be confused with something that prevents graying hair, scientists can now predict thousands of possible DNA structures from a single sequence—because, of course, DNA can’t just have one definitive shape. No, like a true artist, it must maintain a chaotic portfolio of possibilities.
The existing method for figuring out these 3D structures, called Hi-C, involved labor-intensive procedures that made scientists seriously reconsider their life choices. “We used to spend an entire week analyzing a single cell,” MIT researcher Greg Schuette said. “Do you know how painful that is? It’s like trying to untangle your headphones in the dark, but for science.”
Instead, ChromoGen does the work exponentially faster by harnessing AI’s terrifying ability to recognize patterns—something most humans struggle with unless it involves deciding whether Mercury is in retrograde. The AI has been trained on millions of possible DNA shapes, pumping out results so quickly that scientists are now grappling with the existential horror of no longer needing to struggle for their answers.
“It’s unsettling,” admitted MIT graduate student Zhuohan Lao. “We spent years developing complicated experiments, then AI shows up and does it better in 20 minutes. At this point, I’m just hoping my student loans understand nuance.”
While this breakthrough promises new insights into diseases, DNA mutations, and why some people can roll their tongues while others can’t, the research team is also considering other important applications—like using AI to finally explain why no one’s jeans ever fit properly despite being the same size.
The project was funded by the National Institutes of Health, who were last seen contemplating whether they, too, should just let artificial intelligence take over all their jobs.
