**Man Willingly Hands Over Deepest Subconscious Fears to AI for ‘Vibes-Based’ Therapy Session**
In a bold move that completely disregards every sci-fi horror film ever made, one brave soul has decided to entrust their most unhinged nocturnal thoughts to an artificial intelligence chatbot. Because if there’s one thing that screams “sound mental health practice,” it’s handing over your subconscious to a machine best known for confidently making stuff up.
The experiment began when the individual, clearly exhausted from trying to bore friends with detailed accounts of their seven-headed snake encounters, turned to an AI-driven dream analysis app. The app, much like a therapy session conducted by a fortune cookie, promised deep insights into one’s psyche—all while mining one’s deepest fears for data collection purposes to later be used in god-knows-what Silicon Valley nightmare.
“I was a little hesitant at first,” the dreamer admitted, “but then I saw the fine print, which said all dreams were stored ‘safely and privately.’ And, I mean, if there’s one thing Big Tech has, it’s a rock-solid track record of respecting privacy.”
Indeed, placing one’s subconscious in the hands of a technology known for churning out unhinged conspiracy theories about cheese having sentience does seem like a logical step in self-exploration. The AI reportedly responded to a recurring dream about teeth falling out by diagnosing the dreamer with everything from repressed childhood trauma to “a strong subconscious yearning for a career in dental hygiene.”
Skeptics have pointed out that attempting to extract meaning from an AI-generated fever dream could result in nothing more than an elaborate new-age Mad Lib. However, proponents argue that since dream analysis was already a pseudoscience, why not let a completely inorganic entity take over?
At press time, the dreamer was last seen nodding solemnly as the AI informed them that their dream about flying naked through a shopping mall meant they were “emotionally vulnerable yet also craving Capitalist liberation.” A profound revelation indeed.
