Tech-Savvy Bigots Tap AI to Clone Woman’s Voice, Proclaim “Finally, the Future We’ve Been Racistly Dreaming Of!”
In a dystopian plot twist that sounds like the drunken love child of Black Mirror and a Reddit thread, Georgina Findlay, a YouTube presenter with a Mancunian lilt, recently discovered her AI-cloned voice moonlighting as a propaganda intern for the far-right. Yes, you heard that right – even her *voice* didn’t want to live on a student loan budget anymore and decided to freelance for extremists.
“When my brother played me the clip, I thought maybe I’d had a stroke and forgotten giving a TED Talk at a racist rally,” Findlay explains, still reeling from an Instagram reel in which her eerily familiar yet absurdly fabricated voice criticized UK schools for, God forbid, teaching students about things that exist. “They’re forcing us to learn about Islam and Muhammad in school,” Faux-Georgina said in a tone so calm, you’d think she’d just finished meditating on a yoga mat of pure ignorance.
“It’s like my voice went off and joined a hate cult without so much as a text to let me know,” Findlay mused.
Experts, and by “experts” we mean guys in scratched-up glasses who haven’t touched grass since the last Ice Age, are alarmed at the rapid spread of AI deepfake audio misuse. “We always knew AI could surpass humans in chess,” said Dr. Lionel Clicksbait, digital ethics professor. “But no one anticipated it would surpass them in spewing bullshit at this speed.”
The conspiracy mill began after far-right trolls discovered voice cloning software and presumably thought, “Why scream slurs into the void when we can have a lady do it for us instead?” A win-win, apparently, for misogynists who hate both women and doing their own work.
Even more concerning, Faux-Georgina’s voice was calm, measured, and distinctly… *reasonable* – because obviously, if she’d just been screaming, “ALL BOARDS THE BIGOT TRAIN,” even your drunk uncle wouldn’t have believed it. “The terrifying thing here is how believable it is,” lamented Findlay. “One guy even commented, ‘I don’t like her, but at least she’s finally making sense.’”
Predictably, the bigots behind this audio masterpiece are nowhere to be found. “The anonymity this technology provides is very attractive to people who wish to manipulate public discourse without owning up to it,” Dr. Clicksbait supposedly said while visiting therapy to cope with humanity’s dwindling collective IQ.
But it’s not just Georgina Findlay. Fake audio is cropping up everywhere. Last week, a deepfake of the queen was allegedly used to endorse a cologne called “Eau de Brexit,” while another made it sound like Morgan Freeman was narrating blockchain scams. Society is spiraling so fast that even Clippy from Microsoft Word could be running a Ponzi scheme by Christmas.
“Who needs to assassinate someone’s character the old-fashioned way when you can just deepfake it at home while eating Doritos?” says Alfred McParanoia, leader of the Definitely Objective Facebook Group.
As for Findlay, she’s now working overtime to un-f&$% her digital reputation. “Do you know how hard it is to clarify, ‘No, I didn’t say that, it was a Robot Me,’ without sounding like you’re auditioning for Doctor Who?”
In a bid to fight back against fake audio, Findlay has started watermarking her voice. Critics are calling the move “paranoid,” prompting her to respond, “Yeah, but when YOUR voice starts acting as a spokesperson for Flat Earthers, we’ll see who’s laughing.” Spoiler: Nobody.
Meanwhile, the AI developers responsible for voice cloning have pleaded innocence. “We intended this tool to help create audiobooks, or you know, bring extinct animals back to life, Jurassic-Park-style,” one engineer said unconvincingly while clutching an Incel Starter Pack.
Regardless, humanity is now faced with yet another challenge: how to survive in a world where your own mother could call to tell you she loves you, but you’d question if it was really her—or a rogue bot looking to steal your Netflix password.
As for Georgina, she’s learned one valuable lesson from all of this nonsense: “My voice might be stolen, morphed, and misused, but at least I won’t have to make the one-hour commute to spew garbage in person. Thanks, technology!”
